I forgot to write about last weeks episode because I had watched it already the week before. Look, I have NO self-control when “watch the new episode now” is dangled in my face, so after the season premiere I pretty much just watched the second episode immediately after like some kind of junkie.

Since the next episode is already on tomorrow, I will just quickly run down what happened last week:

– Eric wants Sookie as his and bought his house thinking she came with it. He tells her that there are two Sookies; One who clings to being just human and the other one that is coming to grips with the fact that she’s better than that. Sookie gives the winning line of the night with, “And what did you think was going to happen when I did come to grips with it? Do you think my legs are just going to magically open for you?” Yeah, Eric says she was saucy and that is was the Faerie Sookie.

– Sookie ends up whining to Bill to get him to do something about Eric buying her house. She finds out he’s King of Louisiana.

– We get a comical flashback of Bill dressed as a London punk-rocker dude in the 1980’s and he meets Nan Flanagan when she witnesses him feeding off of a glamoring a guy in an alley instead of feeding on and killing the guy. Then we see what happened to Sofie-Anne and why he needed the renovation (Hint: Because she got all over the house when snipers came in and killed her). Nan wanted to know why Sofie-Anne was so into Sookie and Bill lies and says there is no reason and that the former Queen was crazy-obsessed with her. Nan tells him to remember what happens when people lie to her.

– Bill tells Sookie he can’t stop Eric as he has friends in high places, but he’ll see what he can do.

– Lesbian Tara is back! She surprises Sookie, who mistakes her for a horde of fugly-faeries arriving to attack her. She drops her stuff, realizes it’s Tara and heads inside. Eric has replaced her screen door and given her a microwave and she explains to Tara what is going on. While she goes to get blankets from the living room, she discovers a cabinet and opens it to discover that it’s Eric’s daytime hidey hole. With a “MOTHER.FUCKER!” she takes off to Shreveport to try to talk to Pam about this Eric situation.

– Tara goes to Lafayette’s house (YAY) and ends up heading to the witch meeting with Jesus and Lafayette. Inside Marnie tells the group that she plans to resurrect a human next. And says she needs a dead body. Just then, Eric bursts in!

– See, he had gone to Bill, as requested and after telling Bill that he won’t sell back Sookies house, nor leave her alone, and he won’t sell Bill the house either, Bill requests that he check out the coven as they are apparently necromancers who can gain control of vampires.

– Back in the coven, Eric tells them to disband and never meet again. Marnie asks what’s in it for her and he says that it isn’t a negotiation. He asks a terrified Lafayette if he negotiates and the answer is no. Eric bites Marnie and the witches join hands. Lesbian Tara comes in to stake Eric and he throws Marnie down. When she stands up, she starts chanting and the power goes out and the wind blows. Then, Erics face changes and his fangs retract and he leaves. Marnie, face calm, says, “What happened? Is he gone?”

– Crystal and Felton have decided to use Jason to make a cub and to do that he needs to become like them. They change into panthers and attack. Oh, Jason…

– Sookie, after waiting for Eric and him never returning to Fangtasia, leaves. As she’s driving down the street, Sookie encounters a shirt-less Eric. When she stops by him he doesn’t know who she is, or who he is. And then he says, “Why do you smell so good?” Ooh! What gonna happen now?

So, there’s a brief rundown. I plan to cover tomorrow’s episode when I get home from work.